sneezing itchy eyes possible allergies

I know I have sneezing itchy eyes watery eyes um hard to keep my eyes open possible allergies … I just remember that some call ecanatia is good for indicated for sneezing in and allergies from the skype thing humbly with my buddy … sorry tired some voice isn’t as good as it should be I don’t know if I would say my bones feel brittle but I feel like maybe they’re not absorbing vitamin c and calcium the way they should be … anyway this is a record of online what’s going on with me since I can’t seem to write right now

mom is home and she made me some fruit and the bing cherries and strawberries seem to be the most helpful to make me feel little bit better,
but the bananas in the grapes do nothing for me I supposed to do grapes are most tasteless do to over radiation

well I’m posting this on my droid razor phone and it’s gonna die pretty soon as crappy battery life I maybe getting a droid razor maxx

later for now and be blessed all.

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Day 3 of Fruit Fast: Conditioning and Fasting

Out of body experience

Conditioning and Fasting

12/28/11

Well today was day 3 of my first month of fruit fasting.  It wasn’t too bad.  I have been on vacation from work this week.  Forgive me if this reads like a kindergartener wrote it, but I’m in pain at the moment so my thoughts are being pulled in various directions.

So, right now (4:38 pm CST), I feel mildly bloated, like I have to pee but can’t.  To me, based on over 200 of Dr. Morse’s videos that I have watched online, I would say that my right kidney is constipated and possibly adrenals.  Although another representative told me that if my blood pressure in both arms was 120-130/60-70 then it’s not adrenals.  I’m not sure that was accurate.

I have this whole week off so I reorganized my room, finally bought a TV, ordered Detox weeks 1 & 2  (should arrive by next Friday at the latest) from God’s Herbs/Nature’s Botanical Pharmacy, hung my ropelights so they illuminate the whole room very well, bought some tools from home depot, bought stuff for my pvc shoulder pole project, bought apples and grapes, threw out all my other food to eliminate the temptation, asked 3 girls for their phone number, began my fruit fast, bought a UPS and a wireless keyboard, ordered an area rug with guitars and such on it … Needless to say, I’ve definitely been busy!

Anyway, I’d like to tell you about a somewhat frightening thing that occurred earlier.  I had been typing at my computer – really hadn’t felt hungry all day, so I also hadn’t eaten anything.  I got up from my chair to leave to room for something and I instantly had this weird “spiritual” experience.  That’s the best way I can explain it right now.  Immediately after rising I found my head experience a strange sort of dizziness … almost like my head was swimming in some magical fluid with a sort of buoyancy and a vibrating aspect as well.  It wasn’t unpleasant, what came next could have been dangerous had it happened somewhere else though.

Within about 3 to 5 seconds after experiencing the weird dizziness I felt myself falling, as if paralyzed without pain, almost like being really high on salvia.  This has been occurring in very short bursts (about 3 times so far), since I began my fast 3 days ago, but this time was definitely the most intense thus far.  I found myself falling, like timber, toward my closed door.  I reached out with the intent to brace myself on the door frame, which worked for about 2 seconds.  Here’s where the weirdness comes in.  One moment, I was braced (with my arms out in front of me to keep my face from hitting the door) after falling, at a 30 degree angle to the door.  The next thing I knew, I was on my knees, on the floor with my hands on the floor and feeling the pain where my forehead had slammed into the door.  What the Fuck?

I don’t know if this is what happened, but to me, it seemed like my mind/soul left my body for months or days, then re-entered it again, only seconds later than the original space-time marker at which it left.  Was this astral-travel?  Did I just quantum jump accidentally?

Now I don’t know if quantum jumping and astral travel or out-of-body experiences are the same or related or what.  My mom only recently introduced me to the term “quantum jumping” and I really have no idea what that is.  It actually sounds like somebody is naming something based on the old time-travel TV seriesQuantum Leap”.   I don’t know much about these subjects yet, however I plan to know more soon!

(P.S.:  Here is one of the most honest and informative articles on fasting I have yet found online:  http://www.doctoryourself.com/juicefast.html)

Be blessed and have a pleasant journey my friends!

Are Homeostatic Soil Organisms A Scam Or The Heretofore-Illusive Cure For Most Chronic Diseases?

Are Homeostatic Soil Organisms A Scam Or The Heretofore-Illusive Cure For Most Chronic Diseases?

12/02/11

HOMEOSTATIC SOIL ORGANISMS

I decided today to, first and foremost, talk about something that has been on my mind lately.  About a month ago I

Patient Heal Thyself - Jordan S. Rubin, 2003

Patient Heal Thyself - Jordan S. Rubin, 2003

stumbled upon a copy of Patient Heal Thyself, by Jordan Rubin, at a local Goodwill.  I didn’t really know what I was looking for that day, but when I found this, it was literally like a godsend!  Somehow, I just ‘knew’ that Dr. Rubin’s book would hold either the cure or a piece of the “cure” puzzle I had been waiting for.

Despite the well-given wisdom that you should not read on the toilet because it causes hemorrhoids, since I already have hemorrhoids and chronic constipation, I knew I was going to be in the bathroom for at least 20 minutes calmly managing my excretory processes as best I could.  So, I reasoned that with my busy schedule of working, coming home, eating, and sleeping from (unexplained) exhaustion, if Mr. Rubin’s book held the cure to my digestive issues, then reading on the toilet, in my case, could only help my situation.

Anyway, for the last month or so, I have been reading about 6-8 pages each time I use the restroom.  The main premise of the book, I would say is that Jesus and people in biblical and antediluvian times didn’t eat processed food, and they happened to eat (as they didn’t have an way to thoroughly remove all the soil from their food) and work and play in dirt which up until the last 100 years or so, has always contained thousands of species of beneficial bacteria and microorganisms that help our digestive systems process food properly.  Rubin also postulates (and presents interesting statistics and studies to back up his position) that the prevalence and over-use of antibiotics to cure infections in humans, and lessen disease in livestock, along with the chemical pesticides (like Monsanto’s Roundup) farmers have been using may have inadvertently led the the propagation of today’s chronic disease epidemic.

I’ll admit I haven’t finished the book (I’m only about 70 pages through it), and if I’m being honest, I don’t know when I’ll have read the whole thing for certain.  Thus the only thing I can comment on is what I have read so far.   Thus, so far the idea of Homeostatic Soil Organisms seems to make sense.  But, before I get to that, maybe a little more background on my issues would be appropriate.

ORIGINS OF MY MISERY

At the time I first contracted “whatever this is”, the first symptom I experienced was strange and frightening.  I remember sitting in my cubicle where I worked.  I did telephone technical support for a major educational software manufacturer.  Life wasn’t perfect because one of the biggest hurdles in my life (how to talk to women and how courtship worked) was all that was on

Wow ... Look how fun call centers are

Wow ... Look how fun call centers are

my mind.  But, instead of actually going out (I was in college at the time, off campus) and talking to women to get experience and learn the do’s and don’ts of social dynamics, I just stayed at home like a dumbass every night.  I knew that was not the right thing to do but I was too paralyzed with fear (of approaching women) to change.  For at least 5 years from 1998 to 2003 I had a pattern of working some low-level computer tech/support job, and trying to learn various programming concepts at night, in my free time.  So it was when I was at work one day, as I was previously explaining, when all of a sudden, after getting off the phone with a customer, I was struck with a pain in my lower right abdomen, about 3 inches above my waist and centered about halfway across the right half of my abdomen.

The pain started about the size of a dime.  It wasn’t a stabbing, more a dull burning sensation.  But, over the course of the next 30 minutes, it rapidly escalated into a 50 cent-piece size area that felt like somebody had stabbed me, then lit a match or poured rubbing alcohol on my insides.  At this time, I knew very little about human anatomy and physiology.  In fact, though I got A’s and B’s, high school biology was the class I liked the least.  I didn’t see a real practical use for me to know that stuff.  I had rarely ever been ill in my life, even as a child.

Sketch of my pain I made for the Mayo Clinic

Sketch of my pain I made for the Mayo Clinic

I figured “That’s all well and good for folks who are planning to be doctors, farmers, or veterinarians, but how is that going to help me build robots?”  But, fate has a way of setting all the pieces up so that you learn indelibly the why you need to know certain things that as a young adult you could really care less about.

RECIPROCITY

I truly believe I was on a crash-course to leading a life of lonliness and perhaps even a very Scrooge-like existence.  Not only did I not care about how our bodies worked (including our digestive system and our diets), to tell the truth, I really had very little empathy for people in general.  Well, that’s not exactly true either.  It would be more accurate to say my attitude was “live-and-let-live” or “you mind your business, I’ll mind mine”.  To illustrate the point, I had a girlfriend a few years PTMD (prior to my disease ™).  She broke up with me on New Years and do you know the reason she stated?  Of course you don’t, so let me fill you in.  She broke up with me because I didn’t get her parents anything for Christmas!

At the time I thought that was the most ridiculous thing ever.  My own personal belief was that if somebody gives you a gift (present, money, help, etc.), you are not required to give anything in return.  My reasoning was that (and this was fostered by my Dad’s teachings) if somebody gave you a gift and then was mad when you did not reciprocate, then it wasn’t really a gift after all.  No, it was a nefarious incognito bribe of some kind.  Though I can’t quite remember the trigger, I remember I had an epiphany that basically changed the course of my life forever.

EPIPHANIES AND LIFE-LESSONS

Here are some truths I discovered about life and myself in that one brief shining moment:

1) Everything Requires Maintenance:  Anything in life that you want to last needs growth and for growth to happen you need care and maintenance.  This includes relationhips, homes, cars, tools, machinery, pack animals, you body, your legacy, your reputation, …

This is what my car looked like, but with T-Tops.

This is what my car looked like, but with T-Tops.

absolutely everything!  Or to put it more succinctly: You have to take care of anything you want to last.  That may seem obvious to a lot of folks, but to hammer home how ignorant I was of this fact, the first nice car I ever owned was a maroon ’86 Monte Carlo with T-Tops.  I loved that car.  It only lasted 2 years because I didn’t understand that the engine needed lubrication so it’s parts didn’t seize up – thus, I never changed the oil!

2) It’s Ok To Ask For Help Sometimes:  It is an admirable and useful skill to rely on one’s self and be a rugged individualist.  But, sometimes, there are some situations that we just can’t handle by ourselves, and there is no shame – to the contrary, there is courage and strength of character – in asking for help.  Like Joe Cocker once sang “I get by with a little help from my friends”.

3) Make Friends And Choose Your Circle Well:  We are social animals.  We are designed to congregate in groups and build bonds with others.  It is our social network (who we surround ourselves with) that helps define how others perceive us.  Those who have no social network, also have no social status.  They are seen as broken and others are suspicious of them.

OF ALIBIS AND FRAME-UPS

Another important lesson I learned the hard, hard way is that one must always strive to have a verifiable alibi.  Now, when most people hear the word ‘alibi’, they immediately think of murder mysteries and CSI-type stuff.  Well, I’m not talking about for the guilty – I’m talking about for the innocent.

More innocent people are being arrested every day in this country

More innocent people are being arrested every day in this country

In my case, I was the unfortunate victim of a lunatic female who got me arrested by telling the cops that I was chasing her in my truck one night.  Fortunately for me, (I thought at the time), I didn’t have anything to worry about because on the night in question I was in my community college’s computer lab from around 6pm until roughly 1am writing computer programs, and the alleged ‘chase’ took place from 10pm to 11pm the same night.  I reasoned that since I was innocent, I would be found innocent, because justice always prevails … how fucking ignorant and naïve I was!

Yes folks, at 19 years old, I was somewhat introverted and subsequently didn’t have the social experiences that most kids had already known by age 15!  Unfortunately for me, I did not know the ways of the world and was blindsided in court by one particular piece of (shoddy but persuasive) so-called evidence:  Her mom was on the stand testifying that I had left threatening and abusive messages on their answering machine.

I had done no such thing, and I gave up trying to figure out the whole scenario – Why would her mom be lying for her under oath … just to punish me?  For what, … I really didn’t even know this girl!  I had only met her in person twice: once at church youth group, and we went on one date at a roller-rink.  She called me every day for almost 3 years and we talked for 2 hours roughly each time.  I’ll admit, as a mostly shy, lonely nerd I enjoyed the attention!  But after 3 years I knew I had to put an end to these calls that were eating up a lot of time, but we weren’t in a real relationship.

To be honest I really can’t make sense of it.  I remember a day came when I realized these

Biurny Peguero: Another female who got a dude in trouble by false accusations.  The law never would have known if she hadn't voluntarily turned herself in.

Biurny Peguero: Another female who got a dude in trouble by false accusations. The law never would have known if she hadn't voluntarily turned herself in.

calls were just eating up too much of my time, and they weren’t going anywhere, so I tried to politely tell her that she needed to stop calling me.  So, then she got mad and decided to get revenge on me by framing me a year later??  With her Mom as the accomplice??  Did she have a boyfriend that was calling her answering machine and saying he was me as part of some plot to get her mom to finger me as the culprit ?  Why was she trying to ruin my life??   Aggghhhhhh!!!

It really stil boggles the mind.  I gave up trying to analyze and figure it all out a long time ago, and learned to just accept that it was.  Let me tell you, it was as hard for me to do that as it would be for the quintessential robot to compute something when “that does not compute”… (here’s a recent news story about about a woman who falsely-accused a man and had him sent to prison for 4 years)

Unfortunately for me, my being right and innocent had nothing to do with the law.  I learned that in the US Justice system, it is not about who was right or who is telling the truth, rather, it is all about what is most believable.  In this case, only in hindsight, after many years, do I have some understanding of why the guilty verdict was laid upon my head on that fateful day.  It basically boils down to appearance and quantity of circumstantial evidence in lieu of a bona fide witness and my lack of a verifiable alibi.   Knowing what I now now about the law, I’d say when the state was deciding whether or not to try this case,  they probably built a “plausibility” list something like this:

  1. Two female ‘victims’ of harassment and stalking by an older male who had repeatedly made threats enough to cause them the fear for their lives vs a belligerent disrespectful college student with an attitude.
  2. Defendant can’t prove he is innocent because he has no one to verify where he was (alibi).
  3. Newly created “stalker law” needed to be tested.
  4. This is an election year so we can’t piss off any feminist voters.

CONCLUSION:  Definitely try this one – Easy Pickins’!!!

Had I been programming late in the lab with somebody else there, I have great confidence that this girl’s evil plan would have been foiled right there, but such was not the case.

When the trial was almost over I started to get the feeling that my lawyer (public defender) was only doing the minimum required of him and wasn’t really providing the best defense for me.  When the judge asked if there was anything I wanted to say on my behalf, in a moment reminiscent of Al Pacino in “And Justice For All”, I told the judge I did have something to say:

“Your honor, I am innocent of these charges.  I was in the computer lab at my school at the time in question and I’m not really sure why I’m here, because I am innocent.”

Around this time, I noticed his facial expression showing cynical skepticism.  I couldn’t help myself.  My lawyer wanted me to shut up and not make things worse.  But, for me, I was innocent and I was gonna make damn sure that was recorded for the record.  I continued:

“Your honor, I just have to know one thing.  I told you I’m innocent.  I barely know this girl.  I was programming on the night in question.  I have complied with the police.  I turned myself in, even though I am innocent.  I’m not sure what game these ladies are playing at or why they are trying to ruin my life but I can’t just go down without a fight.

So, now that I have reiterated, re-explained, and summarized all those things to you, I will ask you judge:  Do you think I’m guilty?”

My lawyer reached up and touched his hand to my forearm as if to say “This is not the time … you’ll only make things worse”.  But, I did not let that sway me.  Honestly, at that point in the trial I felt that if I was a third party (jury or observer) who didn’t’ know the truth, I probably would find it easy to find me guilty as well.

The judge hesitated.  Even though I had been a polite as could be, he was glaring at me like he had already made up his mind (this was a bench trial which means there is no jury – just one judge to decide your fate)  But still I pressed for an answer.  I felt I already knew what it was gonna be … but I just wanted to hear him say it.  For a moment I wondered if somehow he knew I was innocent and was in on the frame-up?  Maybe when he opened his mouth he would say something that would give him away.

I pressed for an answer again.

“Your honor.  I want you to answer my question:  Do you think I’m guilty?”

“Your honor. I want you to answer my question: Do you think I’m guilty?”

“Your honor.  I want you to answer my question:  Do you think I’m guilty?”  Now he was steaming – you could see he was about to burst, like Yosemite Sam when he gets frustrated by Bugs Bunny.  My lawyer to me: “This is highly unorthodox … blah blah blah.”  “No”, I demanded, raising my voice defiantly, and turning my gaze back to the judge: “I want to know if you think I’m guilty!”

“Yes! Yes!! Yes, I think you are guilty!!!”  Though he was furious, and acted indignant as if HEwas being insulted, I remember he tried to regain some

“Yes! Yes!! Yes, I think you are guilty!!!”

“Yes! Yes!! Yes, I think you are guilty!!!”

semblance of calmness about himself again.  As if realizing he had just embarrassed himself with his emotional outburst he then tried to regain his dignity by giving logical reasons why he felt I was guilty.  I don’t really remember much after that.  I was found guilty and got a deferred sentence.  For me, this was my first experience in a court of law and it was like a nuclear bomb had exploded on my world.  In the moment the guilty verdict was read, I realized then and there that the way I saw the world would never be the same.  My view of police, judges, and lawyers as standing for justice was shattered.

Wow!  That was quite cathartic.  I feel like for almost 18 years that story has been waiting to be told.  It is as if a great burden has been lifted from my mind!

(Wrote this for about 3 hours so now 5:26 pm stopping to watch some vids and eat some grub).

Thanks for listening to the raw, unfiltered story of my life.  The story continues …

Until next time, be blessed and take care!

Welcome to the home of Raw Life Wizard on WordPress!

11/10/118:05 AMWelcome!If you are new to this blog let me tell you what you can expect.  This blog is going to be RAW and UNFILTERED.  It is about the gory details of REAL LIFE and IF YOU ARE SQUEAMISH ABOUT BODILY FUNCTIONS & FLUIDS then This blog is probably not for you and you should TURN BACK NOW.  It is also about HOPE and INSPIRATION so there will be entries on the Secret, Power Of Attraction, Self Help, Tony Robbins, Napoleon Hill, and various other spirituality, healing, and green living topics.  There will be posts on NATURAL HEALING, and JUICE FASTING right next to articles with words real people use to describe bodily functions including shit, piss, poop, defecate, take a dump, bowel movement.  Further, I’m not gay either, however, since my physical problems mostly have to do with hemorrhoids and constipation, many of this posts will be graphic descriptions of various enemas, suppositories, and other insertions.  If you are not mature enough to handle real talk like this then, again, you should probably leave this blog.   However, if you are ready for a first hand “in-the-trenches” account of the the US Medical System, efficacy of various Alternative Health methodologies and practitioners, semi-medical explanations of trials and results of amature experiements in self-healing then please … read on!ABOUT ME:

I am a 36 year old programmer who has held various positions in the IT field.  In 1999 (when I was only 24) I mysteriously, after life a life of (what I thought was) almost complete health and having been sick only a few times in my life and never having a major surgery except my tonsillectomy when I was 8, contracted a case of chronic accute constipation which I still have not been able to rid myself of to this day.  I have seen over 50 doctors including General Practitioners and Specialist at various hospitals and clinics across the US including the prestigious Mayo Clinic, University of Iowa Hospitals & Clinics, and Oregon Health & Science University, to name a few of the best.  Despite their greatest efforts, these allopathic (traditional western medicine) professionals have been unable to offer anything short of figurative bandaids for my condition.  Therefore, I have turned to Natural “Alternative” Healing methods in hope of still finding a cure.

It is really ‘Chicken/Egg’ as to which came first, but my symptoms have always included:

  • Pain in lower right abdomen which progresses up my middle right back and down my groin almost to my knee until I can pee or poop.
  • When I pee I get relief and when I poop I get relief, but I usually pee when I sit to poop so is really just relief from peeing in both cases?
  • Chronic constipation, not being able to poop for 3 days or more
  • Chronic feeling exhausted, although appearing to be in perfect health on the outside …

Well, it’s off to work for me so I have to cut this blog short .  I am starting a new juice fast today, which I am going to aim for a year, but we’ll see what happens with my current job.  I’m still in the probationary period so, yeah.

A few more random comments before I close this post:

  • I threw away my ice cream today
  • I’m taking my candy corn and nuts to work for those guys
  • I have to hit Publix or Winn Dixie and get some bottled green juice and orange juice before work today.
  • I did a digital insertion with raw honey and it has offered some relief

Well, TCFN folks.  Be kind to yourself and have a great day.  Be blessed!